What do you think? If you don't like my poem, tell how it can be changed.

As my feelings pour outside,
no one asks "what's wrong?"
I feel like I don't belong--
They look at me and think,
Dirty, fatso, ugly
So ignorant,
Such an ugly thing, they say.
”I must be so much better then her."
but they don't know me.
They don't know how long.
This ^^^^ has been going on.
Or How people tormented me through the years.
Talking to myself
Because no one cares . . .
I See kids teasing,
But not me, another freak, another geek--
I feel a little better . . .
Self-esteem grows.
All the insecurities pour out,
and turn into nothing.

I like it!!! i think its Wicked :)

It sounds like a song! If you want, I can make up a melody for it :D

One problem- I don't think "fatso" is the right word. Change that word and you'll be good to go!

I think it's good. :) It's way better than anything I can do. But yes, "fatso" maybe should be something else. :)

I like it, although I believe poems should rhyme ;). It's still pretty good though :D

I like it, although I believe poems should rhyme ;). It's still pretty good though :D

Actually, poetry doesn't HAVE to rhyme, although most of it does. :)

Thank you. I'll try to make rhyme.

Awesome!

So meaningful!

very good! i hope you're not talking about yourself :( i'll be your friend!!!

hmn rather than fatso mayhap you can use "fatty" ??? just kidding :lol:

Thank you. I'll try to make rhyme.

I think it's fine without the rhyimingness. But it's your poem, if you want it to rhyme. :)

Actually, poetry doesn't HAVE to rhyme, although most of it does. :)

I know. I just like rhyming poems better. Lilmsumpopular, you don't have to go through the effort of making the poem rhyme if you don't want to. It's just my personal preference, that's all.